How Many Signs Does It Take?

Have you ever heard anyone say, "If I only had a sign..." ...then this is a story you have to hear!!! Annie was a young 21 years of age and wasn't sure what to expect next. She had dated her boyfriend Harold for 4 years now, their families knew each other, they both had good jobs and promising careers, and everyone always commented on what a cute couple they made! So the only thing left to do was get married she thought; if he was the best life had to offer her, she had better not let it pass her by. On March 23, 1993, what seemed to be the beginning of the rest of her wonderful fairytale life with him turned into an absolute nightmare. Everything that could have possibly went wrong, WENT EXTREMELY WRONG!!! For the purpose of not writing a premature biography, let me break it down for the layman: The first thing she was scheduled to do that morning was get her hair done at the salon. Well, the lady she scheduled her appointment with was ill and had an assistant fill in. In short, instead of an elegant updo...Annie's hair looked like a bird had built an elaborate nest in her head. It took Annie, 3 bridesmaids, and her Aunt an extra 2 hours trying to remove the nest looking do from her head and come up with an amendment to her new foul style. Once she was decent and ready for the pre-wedding photos scheduled to take place before leaving for ceremony, Annie got a call. The photographer was on the other line calling from his hospital bed and sharing his story about how he broke his leg the night before. So, one bridesmaid had a disposable Kodak camera and...well...that was the extent of her elegant wedding pictures. After much creative staging for the Kodak camera, it was time to head to the ceremony and in Annie's mind she just knew nothing else could go wrong...or could it? The limousine that had picked up the groom and groomsmen 2 hours prior to drop them off at the ceremony sight was soon to arrive. An hour and no limo later, Annie decided to call the limo company and inquire about her carriage's whereabouts. After another half hour, the dispatcher finally got in touch with the driver of the limo who explained that he was running late because he had to stop a 7/11 to replenish the champagne in the limo that the groom & groomsmen drank up while taking a "joy ride" around the city. Annie insisted through her tears that she and her 11 attendants did not need any champagne and that all she wanted was to get to her wedding!!! After the limo arrived Annie and her 11 attendants gathered their composure and proceeded to arrange themselves into the limo, until they were stopped by the driver. The limo driver told Annie that his limo was only licensed for 10 people and that Harold did not pay him yet. After much begging and negotiating Annie held her gown's train in one hand, and wrote him a check on the hood of the limo with the other. He finally allowed her entire party to ride in the limo for a small extra fee of $100.00. They arrive at the ceremony and everyone got out of the limo except for Annie and her maid of honor. She recalls her maid of honor asking her if she was ready to get married. Annie paused and really wanted to get in the driver's seat of that limo and drive off for her dear life!!! Instead she took a deep sigh and rose from the depths of the limo only to face MORE DISASTERS!!! The entire groom's party was drunk! The intro music had stopped prematurely in the midst of her flower girl walking down the isle, which caused her to throw her basket down and run down the rest of the isle. It was an outdoor garden wedding and IT RAINED! A fight broke out at the reception between some of Annie's bridesmaids and the groomsmen's girlfriends. Annie's drunk Uncle decided to take the mic and sing his own "VODKA tainted" version of YOU ARE MY LADY. The videographer forgot to charge his camera battery and only recorded five minutes of the entire wedding. Harold thought it would be fun to not only smash the cake in Annie's face but all down the front of her dress!!! BIG NO, NO GUYS!!! Annie sought immediate revenge and chased Harold all around the reception sight until she was able to pin him in the middle of the dance floor and smother him with cake. After the toast Annie's stem on her glass broke the minute she set it back down on the table. Someone walked off with the money tree. The marriage lasted all of one year due to Harold's infidelity to Annie. She had to suffer an extra three years until the divorce was final because Harold tried to fight Annie every step of the way. Now thirteen years later, Annie has married her best friend of seven years. They have two beautiful daughters and live happily together on the West coast. The best part about it was that Annie's wedding day was perfect, not a thing went wrong. So if you've ever asked God for a sign...make sure you pay attention to His answer!!! Learned the hard way!

 

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